Stay-At-Home Guide for Parents

As parents, we are trying our best to get through this time in one piece.

As a Behavior Analyst, I share strategies with parents every day, in an effort to help add some harmony back into the home.

Here is my quick go-to list of tips for you to try:

1. Create a visual schedule for your kids.

Structure reduces stress. Your kids will know what to expect, and they can prepare themselves for each transition. A visual schedule takes the surprise or the disruption factor out of the equation. It also means that you as the parent do not have to give orders every hour.

Let the visual schedule do the work for you! Bonus points if you can add in pictures for each activity and personalize with your child’s name and favorite characters. This adds a level of attachment and fun.

2. Display your “House Rules” for everyone to see.

Making expectations clear and visible can increase the harmony in your home. We all need visual reminders. I would be lost without my daily to-do list. Often times the more words we say as parents, the less value each word has for our children. The trail of words eventually falls on deaf ears.

Example rules: “We complete daily schoolwork before TV time.”, or “We brush our teeth and use the bathroom before we get into bed.”

Let your house rules be reminders for your kids and save your words for more positive interactions. This leads me to tip number 3.

3. Catch the “good” behaviors and reward them!

Our kids are struggling too. Their routines have changed, and their freedom has been restricted. They feel our stress. Positive feedback is needed more now than ever before. Make it a goal to “catch the good”.

We have heard “the squeaky wheel gets the grease”. The same concept often applies in parenting. When our kids act out, they get our attention and we react. But do we notice those quiet moments when they are doing their work, or when they brushed their teeth without us nagging them to do so? I encourage you to find any opportunity you can to “catch the good”. Reward these good behaviors with a high five, a hug, a “great work!”, or a little ice cream.

4. Celebrate small victories.

COVID-19 has wreaked havoc in our daily lives. Parents are asked to do the impossible. I invite you to ask yourself:

Did everyone eat today? Were there no devastating injuries? Did everyone end up in their beds before 10pm? Cheers to you!

5. Be kind to yourself.

Parenting right now is HARD. Take a deep breath and know that this time will eventually pass. Pay attention to your inner monologue and practice some self-compassion; you earned it.

This blog post first appeared on May 6, 2020 in Medium.